Ups and Downs

Ups and downs; we all have them.  I have them several times a day, as a matter of fact.  I have them emotionally (it doesn't take a whole lot to set me off, especially lately for some reason), and I have them physically.  Since my post in February about losing 52 pounds, I have had many ups and downs on the scale.  But it has actually made me quite aware of what I have to do to maintain a healthy weight and a healthy body.

Over the summer, I gained a few pounds.  The scale was at about 164 - 165 after a month of moving stress, among other things.  I could see it in the mirror.  I could feel it in my clothes.  I was super unhappy about it.  But, it has since come off and I am sticking to around 160, which seems to be my go-to weight.  Now, while I can see where another ten pounds would be good to drop, I don't feel unhappy about this.  I am so proud that I have been able to maintain a weight within ten pounds of what I consider the ideal weight for my body, and I am super comfortable in my skin right now.  I look in the mirror, and honest to goodness, I like what I see.  I am happy with myself, with my body, with my health.  I don't deny myself the little indulgences that I crave, I eat a generally very healthy diet (though sometimes I forget to eat lunch, still) and I feel pretty good.  The only complaint I have is in the energy department, which is due to lack of sleep, and I know it.  I have a love/hate relationship with sleep, and I definitely need to remedy that problem. 

So I have had minor ups and downs on the scale this year, but they have never gone up more than ten pounds, and have always come back down to something more reasonable for me.  Of that, I am incredibly proud.  I am certain of myself, and of my ability to be at a healthy weight for the rest of my life.  I can't say that I will never be heavy again because I still battle with my emotional eating problem, but I can say that I value myself enough to know that I will always work to be healthy.  I love myself enough to take care of myself, both physically and emotionally.  Happiness is a choice (stole that phrase from someone, but it's true).  And, instead of looking at my ups and downs with a negative perspective, I choose to be proud, happy and certain of myself.